I forgot my password & e-mail address, rightI really had forgotten my password & apparently my e-mail address isn't matching my username [it's the exact same with my facebook I log on about once or twice a month cause every single time I forget my password, grrr] but whilst that is true I simply just haven't logged on in ages...actually over 56 weeks apparently...shit time flies. I've just been having some mental block, & I don't know what to write what to say without getting really angry. & I was online just googling random things, such as my obsession for piercings *mwhaha* & I just really wanted to log on [hence the forgetting my password & such] & then I continued about my business & it just hit me then & there! [My password that is..]
I was in the library the other day with my younger brother & later he actually let me read some of his *work’s in progress* & I just felt almost awoken [crap he’s really good..] my Mam kept going on about how much I loved English [as if I don’t any more] & writing & it just made me feel even more angry that I have this mental block that just attacks me every time I pick up a pen. I haven’t broken it yet but I am trying. I'm so inspired yet I'm so uninspired at the moment. I just need some new radical transformation.
I feel like I’ve grown a lot in the last year, I’ve learned a lot about myself & I’ve let go of some things I never thought that I could. I feel kind of heart-broken that this time a few years ago I lay awake crying myself to sleep unable to bare the thoughts of living without a certain person in my life but I’ve lived & learned & loved again, well felt again & although no one will ever touch my heart in the same way I feel somewhat stronger, & I know it’s so random & this journal makes no sense but it just makes up a huge part of me & the problem is in the last year I’ve pushed so many people away & hid myself away to the point where I feel like I’m no longer human sometimes. & I guess this has something to do with why I haven’t been around
So hi everyone I wasn’t trying to excuse my absence as such *once again* but start again, I hope that I’ll be speaking with you all again soon enough. Little by little.
It's not that 'If I can't write I won't bother reading your work' it's that inspiration isn't about what I write it's about what I feel & if I can't put my thoughts into words then who am I to read yours? If that makes any sense..Anyhow I just wanted to say something briefly.
g'night
Lonely
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Oppression, quiet and Repressed
Swept under the seams
the bed of the acquiesced
where we sleep, insomniac dreams
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If it's just a game, then what are we crying for?
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Now that you've left, I see sides of myself I wish I kept around rather than throw them away for you.
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If it's just a game, then what are we crying for?
--
Now that you've left, I see sides of myself I wish I kept around rather than throw them away for you.
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If it's just a game, then what are we crying for?
--
Now that you've left, I see sides of myself I wish I kept around rather than throw them away for you.
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